Wonderful Article on Modesty and Testimony
Dear Friends, I recently had a website visitor ask the following question on modesty and I wanted to share the question and my answer in hopes it might be an encouragement to some of you: Question: "I notice that your website talks a lot about modesty in which I am in total agreement. God has been working on my heart on that. However, reading other sites they stress dresses and femininity. Can you tell me, because I guess I don't really see too much of it in the Bible, do you always wear dresses? Do you feel you have a biblical reason for doing so, if applicable? I like dresses and all and would have to do a major wardrobe change, but I guess I don't see that pants are immodest unless they are skin tight. I guess I would just like to hear reasons why wearing a dress is stressed on some Christian websites similar to yours." -Jennifer My Answer: Thanks for writing, Jennifer! I feel there is a real need to encourage modesty and femininity in our day and age. However, I don't think we can make hard and fast rules from Scripture to say that Christian women should only wear dark-colored woolen dresses that come down to at least eight inches below their knees. I know some have sought to come up with strict guidelines in this area, but I just don't see that in Scripture. However, I do see in Scripture that women are to dress modestly and should be an outward reflection of an inward heart of purity, grace, and meekness. With that in mind, I have some basic guidelines I follow: 1) I dress to please my husband. He's my "modesty measuring stick." I ask him what he likes and what his preferences are in this area in regards to style of clothing, colors, etc. Some husbands could care less about this and in that case, look to the Lord for guidance. However, most husbands will want their wives to dress tastefully (most husbands will get tired of sweats and big t-shirts all the time very quickly). Our outward appearance and countenance is a direct reflection on our husbands and on the Lord. What kind of message are we sending to the world? 2) I dress so that others can tell from across a parking lot that I'm a woman. God has created me a female and I am in no way ashamed of it. I want to be a beautiful -*test*-('")imony of femininity to the world. 3) I seek to dress in a way that would not cause another brother to stumble. Knowingly wearing something which could cause a brother in Christ to lust is a sin against God and against this brother on my part. Yes, men are responsible for what their eyes look at, but we women need to step up to the plate and do our Christian brothers a favor by helping them have fewer "stumbling blocks." Not sure what would cause a man to stumble in this area? Just go ask your husband, or your father, or your brother. You might be surprised. 4) I strive to focus on inner character rather than outward beauty. God is most of all concerned with our hearts. The most important thing is that you seek to glorify the Lord and honor your husband in the way that you dress. For some, this might mean wearing dresses all the time, for others, this might mean something different. More than anything else, we need to seek to have our hearts right before the Lord for I truly believe that modesty begins with the heart. -Crystal I wanted to close with sharing this wonderful story Jessica emailed to me recently on the subject of modesty: An amusing and beautiful thing happened this morning and I have to share it with you . . and also thank you for encouraging modest dress on your website! Please know that I am not being judgmental in telling this story. It is just a -*test*-('")ament - at least in my opinion - to the way men react based on how a girl chooses to attire herself. In NYC, for women, walking past or through a construction area is always an "event." I'm not saying that the men are always crude or inappropriate, but you never know what comments are going to be made and it can be extremely uncomfortable. Most women and girls I know have gotten used to it, ignore it, and avoid it when it's possible. This morning, I saw barricades and workers in their jackets and hard hats milling around up ahead of me, as I was about half a block away from my office. As I crossed the street I realized there was no way I was getting to the building entrance without passing through the pedestrian walkway that had been put up to allow people to navigate through the construction site safely. There was a young woman ahead of me, also going into my building, who was dressed in a very short skirt, high stiletto heels, and a nearly-sheer sleeveless blouse. A few of the men whistled and some of them called out to her - a few of them even jokingly stood in her path. She lowered her head and started walking more quickly which, of course, didn't really help the matter at this point. I kept on walking, figuring that I might be in for it as well, since this was clearly a rowdy group. Most of their eyes had now turned to me, in my pretty-but-simple capped-sleeve dress, with a skirt that hit my knees, and "boring" low heels. And what did one of the men say to the rest of the group standing on the walkway? "Make way for the lady." -Jessica Have a beautiful day rejoicing that God has made you a woman for His glory! Crystal, for Jesse and Kathrynne http://www.BiblicalWomanhood.com
Dear Friends, I recently had a website visitor ask the following question on modesty and I wanted to share the question and my answer in hopes it might be an encouragement to some of you: Question: "I notice that your website talks a lot about modesty in which I am in total agreement. God has been working on my heart on that. However, reading other sites they stress dresses and femininity. Can you tell me, because I guess I don't really see too much of it in the Bible, do you always wear dresses? Do you feel you have a biblical reason for doing so, if applicable? I like dresses and all and would have to do a major wardrobe change, but I guess I don't see that pants are immodest unless they are skin tight. I guess I would just like to hear reasons why wearing a dress is stressed on some Christian websites similar to yours." -Jennifer My Answer: Thanks for writing, Jennifer! I feel there is a real need to encourage modesty and femininity in our day and age. However, I don't think we can make hard and fast rules from Scripture to say that Christian women should only wear dark-colored woolen dresses that come down to at least eight inches below their knees. I know some have sought to come up with strict guidelines in this area, but I just don't see that in Scripture. However, I do see in Scripture that women are to dress modestly and should be an outward reflection of an inward heart of purity, grace, and meekness. With that in mind, I have some basic guidelines I follow: 1) I dress to please my husband. He's my "modesty measuring stick." I ask him what he likes and what his preferences are in this area in regards to style of clothing, colors, etc. Some husbands could care less about this and in that case, look to the Lord for guidance. However, most husbands will want their wives to dress tastefully (most husbands will get tired of sweats and big t-shirts all the time very quickly). Our outward appearance and countenance is a direct reflection on our husbands and on the Lord. What kind of message are we sending to the world? 2) I dress so that others can tell from across a parking lot that I'm a woman. God has created me a female and I am in no way ashamed of it. I want to be a beautiful -*test*-('")imony of femininity to the world. 3) I seek to dress in a way that would not cause another brother to stumble. Knowingly wearing something which could cause a brother in Christ to lust is a sin against God and against this brother on my part. Yes, men are responsible for what their eyes look at, but we women need to step up to the plate and do our Christian brothers a favor by helping them have fewer "stumbling blocks." Not sure what would cause a man to stumble in this area? Just go ask your husband, or your father, or your brother. You might be surprised. 4) I strive to focus on inner character rather than outward beauty. God is most of all concerned with our hearts. The most important thing is that you seek to glorify the Lord and honor your husband in the way that you dress. For some, this might mean wearing dresses all the time, for others, this might mean something different. More than anything else, we need to seek to have our hearts right before the Lord for I truly believe that modesty begins with the heart. -Crystal I wanted to close with sharing this wonderful story Jessica emailed to me recently on the subject of modesty: An amusing and beautiful thing happened this morning and I have to share it with you . . and also thank you for encouraging modest dress on your website! Please know that I am not being judgmental in telling this story. It is just a -*test*-('")ament - at least in my opinion - to the way men react based on how a girl chooses to attire herself. In NYC, for women, walking past or through a construction area is always an "event." I'm not saying that the men are always crude or inappropriate, but you never know what comments are going to be made and it can be extremely uncomfortable. Most women and girls I know have gotten used to it, ignore it, and avoid it when it's possible. This morning, I saw barricades and workers in their jackets and hard hats milling around up ahead of me, as I was about half a block away from my office. As I crossed the street I realized there was no way I was getting to the building entrance without passing through the pedestrian walkway that had been put up to allow people to navigate through the construction site safely. There was a young woman ahead of me, also going into my building, who was dressed in a very short skirt, high stiletto heels, and a nearly-sheer sleeveless blouse. A few of the men whistled and some of them called out to her - a few of them even jokingly stood in her path. She lowered her head and started walking more quickly which, of course, didn't really help the matter at this point. I kept on walking, figuring that I might be in for it as well, since this was clearly a rowdy group. Most of their eyes had now turned to me, in my pretty-but-simple capped-sleeve dress, with a skirt that hit my knees, and "boring" low heels. And what did one of the men say to the rest of the group standing on the walkway? "Make way for the lady." -Jessica Have a beautiful day rejoicing that God has made you a woman for His glory! Crystal, for Jesse and Kathrynne http://www.BiblicalWomanhood.com